About Le Mot Finale V xo

Visit Le Mot Finale and find out what I'm about. It pretty much reflects my personality to a T. Oh yeah, K would also appreciate the love! My work here is done, Exit stage left! V xo

Barrington Orr, You Make Me Smile

Growing up in northern Ontario isn’t an inspiring place when it comes to fashion. I would wander the halls in my Roxy T-shirt (gross), and bootcut jeans (even worse), in a daze just hoping that my mom would take me to Toronto to get me clothes I actually wanted to wear. Northern folk don’t tend to give two shits as to the look of a garment, as long as it’s warm, functional, and of ok quality. That’s when it happened, a beacon of light! I met my dear friend J, whom was dressed in the latest, and had a flare for making you feel good, as long as he liked you.

Isn’t J a doll?

Since those dark high school years, him and I have gotten even closer, and he’s gone on to make somewhat of a name for himself in the fashion world. I trust that you’ve all heard, if not frequently read his blog Barrington Orr. Though he’s modest about it, his site is really a glimpse into his beautiful mind, with a keen eye for style, a flair for the dramatic, and with a click of a button, you’re hooked. After his tireless hours working with his talented team, he’s getting much recognition, and has been invited to several fashion shows with backstage passes, and I’m hoping catering. Having spoken with him over the past couple of weeks, him and I are in cahoots to bring all of you something that is sorely needed in our lives. He’s thought up a brilliant device that tbh, no one else has really thought to customize. Ah! I can’t tell anybody what it is, but this man has found a hole in the market, and he plans on filling it…errm, yep. Filling it.

Enough of my flattery and banter, go and see for yourself. He will be one of the greats, and I’m so glad that he’s a close friend. Check out his daily posts, contests, and pics over at barringtonorr.com. I promise you’ll become one of his 6000 + readers, and that number is growing every day.

xo V

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We’ve Been Hibernating!!

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My limbs are stiff, my skin is dry, but by golly, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel! Sorry, we’ve been successfully hibernating all winter, and haven’t popped our heads far enough out of our chunky turtlenecks, to really take a good look around. It seems at this time of year, that the days drag, the nights are too short, and that the world will never defrost from this terrible Popsicle, that we deem winter. Isn’t it a bitch? Anywho, K and I have been trying to work our way out of the funk, by looking at…drum roll…SPRING SHOES!! Ta daaaahhh!! The colors are so brilliant, the lines are delicate, and our thoughts of wearing no socks soon, make our hearts warm with excitement. 

ZSEY137_OUT_LGK just sent me this link from our wonderful friends at Modcloth.com, and I fell in love instantly. Looks like the thick half wedged heel, will be the new silhouette this year, hopefully clearing out those god forsaken chunky wedges, that somehow made a comeback from the trash that was 90’s fashion. Terrible. My mom actually handed me a pair, that my 50 year old aunt wore in the 90’s, with the original Le Chateau box, and I almost blew chunks. It made me sick that this was being recycled into today’s much more informed society:
originalI literally googled “Terrible 90’s wedges”. Let’s not go back here people. Last summer, this made me weep. How far would it go? Are we going to bring back snap bracelets, that are weapons btw, butterfly hair clips, and…gag…Lisa Frank? Heavens to Betsy, did people even shower or brush their teeth back then?! No…no they did not. I think I witnessed more armpit hair, than one small child should. The memory haunts me still.

Back to what I was actually talking about! Shoes! Look at all the great ones that we’ve stumbled upon!

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Chelsea Crew nik nak heels in green

Long story short, classic lady like lines are coming back, and clunky hooves are out. Modcloth.com is chock full of beautiful styles for spring, so we highly suggest you get your bad-retro self together, and invest in some timeless pieces. Isn’t it also wonderful that risk of injury and spinal issues goes down, with the height of the heel? Cheers to being able to walk around in comfort, without sacrificing style this season! And cheers to K and I for showing our faces after some long winter months!

P.s. I know that I am now obsessed with my new discovery, of the very talented Chelsea Crew. Thank you for restoring my faith in humanity!

Smoother Than A Dude With A Mustache

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Wow. It’s been a while hasn’t it? Well hi! I’m back, I’m salty today, so this little post better cheer me up. Pinterest, as mentioned previously, has peaked my interest with it’s DIY section as of late, and you can say that K and I have gone a little bit squirrely trying EVERYTHING. Or so we think, because, well frankly, we’re slightly vain. In the best possible way of course. 

So out of all of these wonderful DIY that we’ve been experimenting with, one seems to be standing out a bunch, well a couple do, but this one especially, is a small almost daily luxury. I’ve made my own scrub!! And now that I know the basic formula for making any scrub, I’m going to make more, and gift them! Hello cheap DIY *Christmas! (*Christmas is that holiday that used to be called Christmas, but now it’s just the Holidays…pfft) Anywho, so this would be the recipe that K and I have made, passed around, and use on ourselves almost daily. I have a ton of friends who have torn through 4 cups worth, and come back pleading for more…ahem Stiney! I love that girl. 

So here we go! This one is a morning caffeine shot for your skin. The coffee in the scrub acts as an antioxidant, which tightens your skin, and apparently helps reduce the look of cellulite. I don’t have any (sorry), so I don’t know if that’s true, but this stuff really helps to tone and hydrate, and it feels like the most satisfying all over scratch of your life. You’ll feel like you’re in a spa, but you’ll open your eyes, and realize that you’re just at the stupid gym, and you probably shouldn’t be moaning with pleasure in the shower….guilty. Red faced….

Recipe!

1 cup Sugar (can be cane, brown, white, raw)

1/4 cup Carrier Oil (Aka olive, baby oil, almond oil, safflower oil) *I use baby oil with vitamin e and aloe

5tbsp Coffee Grounds

1 tsp Vanilla Extract

1 tsp Almond Extract

pinch Lime Juice as a preservative

Mix it all together, it should be crumbly, stick it in a water proof jar and voila! Little ingrown hair bumps behind your legs? No? Well gone. Behind your arms? Gone! Smoother than a wet harp seal, ladies and gentlemen! They’re smooth right? Sure!  I win! 

Love you! 

V xo

A Sticky Face Is a Glowing Face.

I think I’ve established that I’m basically a product whore  lover. On a recent lunchtime trip to Shoppers Drug Mart, K was trying to pick out a new conditioner, and everything she picked up I said I tried, and yay or nay. She’s now worried for me and my bank account, and possibly my sanity? I’ve been like this for as long as I can remember. So in an effort to save my bank account, I have taken a more natural, DIY approach to my skincare.

It’s been three weeks since I have been using a lemon honey mask, and my face looks glowy! My skin already hurt people’s eyes when in direct sunlight, but now they are blinded. I like to think it’s my beauty, but let’s be realistic. I am one pale wonder. The lemon in the mask actually helps you circulation, and to brighten your skin, while the honey acts as an antioxidant, getting rid of those pesky pimples, and any other contamination. For a week now, I’ve been using it on Boyfriend’s troubled skin, and he’s showing signs of improvement!

So here we go:

Honey Lemon Mask:

1 part lemon juice, 1 part honey

Mix until it’s the consistency of cough syrup, and apply to face with a cotton ball. Let that sucker sit for 20 minutes, and they say try not to talk, but that’s impossible for me. I was once asked to take a 10 day vow of silence by my enlightened older brother, and I couldn’t even last 10 minutes. Verbal diarrhea is one of my many talents! As well as origami, but that’s a whole other post. Now rinse! How amazing do you feel? Pretty goddess like right? It’s ok John, you can try it and feel like a goddess too.

Enjoy!

V xo

P.S. You can totally use this over your entire body, but you may have to stand still on a tarp in the middle of your living room for 20 minutes. In that case, I hope you live alone or with your partner. Could get awkward with roommates. Like the time in college, where I boycotted pants and made everyone else do the same. Nothing sexual.

I Can’t Walk Today…Because Of Kettle Bells!!

This is Christine Zane. She is my inspiration, and her hubby Frank, is boyfriend’s! They are a fantastic couple with a great outlook on health and fitness, and they have also written quite a few books on the subject. We have a signed copy. No big deal. (it’s a big deal)

Bet your mind went elsewhere with that title…didn’t it? Well let me tell you a little something about my recent workouts. They hurt. But man do they give me the results I strive for. My most recent self inflicted punishment  workout involves a 20 lb kettle bell, and all of my willpower.

Basically, by the end of the workout you will have done about 150 squats, and your thighs will burn like the heat of a thousand suns! But it’s worth it. I promise. I have developed this strange obsession with sculpting my body, and it’s all boyfriend’s fault. Do you know how guilty I feel when I eat reese’s?! I feel like I killed 7 puppies and baked them into pies. It’s terrible. Sometimes I wish that I knew nothing about nutrition and working out, but I’m glad that I do, seeing as my body is nice and firm! You could bounce a quarter off of my butt! Could be dangerous though, it might ricochet and hit you in the eye.

And this would be Frank Zane. Delicious right?? That’s basically what boyfriend looks like including that beard. I’m fine with it. 

Anyway, this chick on YouTube showed me how, and though it doesn’t look like it’s that big of a deal, it’s a great workout, and it only takes about a half an hour to complete. It’s designed to work every muscle in your body, and because functional workouts are best, this one tones like crazy. I choose not to rest between sets, so that I get my heart rate up, and keep it there, which is the only way to burn calories. Please don’t start off with a 20 lb weight though. My goal is to make you feel the burn, not to dislocate your shoulders. Mind your form, because, it’s so easy to hurt and pull major muscle groups when you’re sloppy. I should know, I threw my lower back out a year ago, and I couldn’t even walk for a solid month. Do you know how embarrassing it is to have to try and stand up off the toilet, only to not be able to stand and pull your pants up? I ended up in the fetal position on the floor, pants around my ankles, and crying for boyfriend to come and help me. He picked me up, pulled my pants up, all while laughing so hard he was crying. I just cried. No big deal.

So check out this great video, and try doing this 4 times a week with an hour of cardio thrown in on an off day. My little belly is shrinking steadily, and though I can barely walk, but my legs look fantastic!

Keep Going!!

You’re getting there! Are you angry at me yet? You will be…

And fini! Feel free throw up, or sling insults at me for the pain I have brought to your life. Love you.

And there you have it! Don’t think I’m crazy yet? I’m upping the weight to 25 pounds next week. Keep in mind I’m 5’4, and 130 lbs of pure muscle and awesomeness! And fat. Never have zero percent body fat. That’s just asking for mood swings, and no boobs. Please try it! It’s actually a lot of fun, and you can do this with a workout buddy and push each other further. Enjoy your new bodies, ladies.

Check out My Oh My Tv for a ton of workout videos and inspiration! Also, go visit Frank and Christine Zane, and buy their books! Seriously, these two are amazing and still look fantastic. I hope I’m still that sexy when I’m their age.

V xo

You Know That One? Yeah. Let’s Talk About THAT One.

We all know her. That one girl that always seems to get herself entwined in your new relationship (not on purpose). That one that lurks in the shadows of the past, just waiting to pounce! Or so it seems. Maybe it’s the way we women are wired, or maybe it’s not just us. Men seem to have this problem too. Is it all in our heads? Are we punishing each other for misdeeds that happened when our hearts were young and tender?

I have a theory. Everyone clings to someone or something  from their past until they’re content with the person that they meet in the present. It’s hard to let go of good memories, and look at them as just that. A memory. Nothing more, nothing less. Instead the mistake of mentioning the past, and getting a glint in the eye is made time and time again, and people are hurt, and become paranoid that the second the lurker of the past re-emerges. Then boom! We’re done, capoot, fini, gonzo! Don’t you just want to pop her little head off and punt it into a pit of fire that burns hotter than a thousand suns?!

This should be an Olympic sport! A la 50 shades of vintage doily love. That’s a thing, right?? Vintage doily love? We really love doilies.

Ah but this is not the case my lovelies! The truth is, we’re afraid of letting ourselves be loved and love completely. I can’t tell you how much I fought falling in love with boyfriend when we first met, out of fear that he wouldn’t feel the same or hurt me. You have to trust your instincts and realize that until you can trust yourself wholeheartedly, you can’t trust or love another. Finally I let myself fall, and I’ve never looked back. Now he’s boyfriend of 3 years, or so, I don’t know we don’t count, and I’m aglow with happiness.

What brought this on you ask? Oh just a little thing called paranoid girlfriends texting me in a panic because an ex was brought up, or a girl whom they’ve always suspected had a crush on their man. My god! I read this dribble thinking to myself, just stop. Stop thinking about who he could be with, and realize he chose you for a reason! That girl has been there forever, and they had their chance! Eff her and her ass length curly hair, her perfectly manicured toes and her fake British accent. He belongs to you! And if you can’t trust his judgement, maybe you should look in the mirror and say: WTF self esteem? Don’t fail me now! Even though, you’re probably PMSing. If you are pmsing, do yourself a favor and cry over a pint of Chunky Monkey, and release that tension.

I would like to drink beer in the river with Boyfriend! His beard would smell funny afterward though. That’s minus 5 points. 

What have we learned? Trust! Trust yourself, trust him, and trust your gut. Don’t lurk, don’t check up, don’t question. Be his best friend, laugh with him, argue about stupid things like socks under the coffee table, and always kiss each other good night. I guarantee that you’ll feel better, and he’ll gravitate toward you. I hate seeing nagging girlfriends, because I know it’s just a matter of time before he goes and does something stupid. Know what boyfriend said? If a girl keeps on accusing a guy of cheating, or performing whichever horrible misdeed she can think up, the more he’ll be inclined to just go do it. May as well actually be blamed about something you actually did! He has a beard, so I believe him.

So stop being effing retarded, and making us cool girls, ahem K and I, look bad. Be super cool and you’ll have a super cool awesomely amazing relationship. With yourself and your man. And remember, you’re super cool, so if he does something stupid, then obviously, he’s not worth your time. And he clearly rides a short bus named Dale. I saw one once.

He’s not impressed with you either. And Corgis are the wizards of the dog world. 

V xo love you

Ps. Super cool is the phrase of the day. So just chill the eff out.

My Spare Time Goes Into Figuring Out How To Be Taller.

Are you short? Yeah me too. My only saving grace is the fact that I have mile long gams. I sometimes throw on a full skirt, and get completely engulfed in it, but I never realize it because, well, I don’t own a full length mirror. So I tromp off to work thinking I look like a supermodel, only to get there, and catch a glimpse of a 6 year old wearing makeup. Like, come on! This has fueled me into doing copious amounts of research..ahem 2 hours..and figuring out how to dress taller! Yay! I cracked the case…or all women stalk did. I just had the nifty skills to look through it and figure out what would work for me.

Look how long your legs would look! And how tiny the waist looks!

High waisted pants. They’re all over the place right now, and they’ll be in full force this fall. I know, I know. Mom jeans come to mind, but this is not the case! Pleated fronts and giant bums are totally 90’s, and instead we are met with a chic, flat front skinny or cigarette pant, that flatters the figure and makes your legs look a mile long! Pair these bad boys with some schmexy heels, and bazinga! You’re an amazonian goddess! Do watch yourself with the wide legged pants though. They look spectacular on tall women, but us shorties get lost in all that fabric.

Tall and sexy? Coulda fooled me!

Heels! I love them. They make me feel like I’m on the catwalk, and don’t lie, we all pretend to be. The only reason K and I don’t wear them at work is because they make too much noise, and I for one, like to sneak around like a ninja. But this must change! When picking out a pair of heels, stay away from ankle straps. They cut the leg at a funny place, and make you look stumpy, really vetoing the whole reason behind wearing them in the first place. Not into heels? S’ok! Get some pointed flats. They draw the leg line out, and if you need to kick a burglar, it’ll pack more of a punch.

Don’t Do this. Never ever do this. Where did her body even go? Narnia?

Sigh, this is the worst part for me. Know those flowy tops that are everywhere? Yeah…they don’t work. Too much fabric, not enough person. Billowy tops make us look like we’re wearing a moomoo. My bf has been telling me this since day one, but I always told myself “Pffft he has a beard. What the hell does he know about fashion?” Turns out, even though he has a beard, he has eyes, and he was right. (Please don’t tell him. I’ll never hear the end of it) Those shirts make short thin girls look like they’re hiding something. A gun? A baby bump? A baguette? Who knows. Instead opt for fitted shirts, and don’t be afraid of tucking! These aren’t your mom’s clothes, and tucking makes you look skinny and tall! Pair with a skinny belt and voila! Bonjour miss Hepburn! (Stay away from large belts, unless your name is Xena, or Hercules)

She may not have been that short, but doesn’t she look super tall? Take after her ladies, she knew what was what.

Lesson learned? Please ditch the garments that don’t fit you…I beg! I’m currently clearing out my wardrobe, which is painful, but guess what? I have no clothes left so I have to go shopping! I’m so sad about that. Have fun! And remember, I’m always right…about everything. I knew all along that those shirts made me look big, I swear.

V xo

P.s Thanks All Women Stalk! You are fantastic!